italiana@writeme.com

Jesus Speaks…

How often do you pray? How often do you worry? Worry is a call to prayer and any time you stop and pray whether you realize it or not it is a prompting by the Holy Spirit. How great is our God that he has given us the gift of prayer. We are three dimensional beings and we must be fulfilled spiritually, physically and emotionally.

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It is important to be good stewards of our bodies and as a personal trainer, I am in love with taking care of my body by doing my best to get plenty of rest, regular exercise and eating healthily. I know for myself, as we all do, at times in our lives we struggle to find balance. But in order to have peace and joy in all circumstances of life, you need prayer. Prayer is so powerful because it is not only an outlet to relieve stress and worry but it cultivates trust in God. Prayer transforms you through time.

An example, I can compare it to is, when a person starts exercising they may not be very strong and have very little endurance to do much at the beginning. They will have greater physical limitations than someone who workouts regularly. But if that person stays committed to making time or even better scheduling a certain time each day to exercise, as the days turn into weeks, weeks into months, that same individual will not recognize themselves in the mirror. In the long run, the individual committed to consistent exercise and healthy eating habits will be leaner, stronger, have more energy and more optimism about life. They will have gone down a few pant sizes and their faces will have changed as well. I see prayer the same way, at first it may seem hard to “find time”, but just like an hour workout is only 4% of your day taking even 15minutes to pray is doable.

If you can commit to prayer you will grow in fortitude which is a gift of the Holy Spirit. It’s those individuals in this life that have a deep and rich prayer life that are blessed with many beautiful gifts from the Holy Spirit, such as good counsel, they are sensitive to sin and more alert to paths that may not be God’s will for their lives.

14458-woman-praying-lake-water-sun-light-silhouette-wide.1200w.tn Whether or not you are consistent in your prayer life, today is a new day. You can start today. I have found certain devotions help me focus and draw me to prayer. I look forward to my prayer time and it is a priority in my day. There are so many beautiful devotions to learn about and that is another aspect of the Catholic faith that I love. Yes prayer can be just you talking to God and this is very important but devotions such as the Holy Rosary, Divine Mercy Chaplet and Novenas are amongst my favorite. These devotions have transformed my spiritually journey.

I encourage you to pray and find devotions that touch your heart and help draw you closer to God. As each person is different, different devotions will appeal to every person. Although, I encourage devotion to the Holy Rosary most fervently as it trains your mind to focus on the mysteries of Christ’s life and since our imaginations are not static but constantly on, it takes discipline and focus to keep calling your mind back to the life of Christ as you pray along The Way of his joyful, sorrowful, luminous and glorious mysteries of his life. But what I love most about the rosary is the peace in my heart after praying it especially at times when this is the devotion that I turned to seeking consolation and seeking God’s will in my life. The 15 promises of the rosary are encouraging. I believe in them and have seen many graces and signs in my life that I know are from God. A gift given to me by my frequent petitions through the Holy Rosary.

Prayer is a way to have a conversation with God and an opportunity to invite him into your life. God loves you so much he wants to be involved in all aspects of your life but he is not a pushy, self-imposing controlling God, he waits for you to approach him.

He waits for you to tell him about your problems, questions or anxieties. He wants you to tell him about your life. As it is important in all conversations to speak, it is just as important to listen. In your prayer time, remember to make time to listen to Jesus. If you are always talking how can you give him a chance to reply. Another way to pray and listen, that is very powerful is Eucharistic Adoration. Almost every town has a chapel where you can just go sit and be with our Lord. I pray you take time to visit him regularly and just listen. Allow him to transform your soul, he will speak to your heart.

How beautiful is the love language of God, he speaks to us in this gift of prayer. Prayer, has many forms, meditative, contemplative, conversational and also listening which almost always is overlooked. I encourage you to listen to promptings of the Holy Spirit and when you feel worried pray. When you are overtaken with the beauties of nature, the moon at night, the flowers of the earth and the stars in the sky, pray in thanksgiving for his gifts.

Remember to thank God for his goodness and cherish the gift of prayer. Prayer is our connection to the Almighty God, our creator, he is the source of all that is good. My prayer is for you to run to God in prayer and find the unceasing peace and hope it provides. Remember to listen to Jesus speak, he longs to tell you how much he loves you. May the Holy Spirit always guide you.

A Mother’s Love.

A Mother, is one who sacrifices her needs for those she loves, her children and her family. A Mother’s love is closest, I believe to that of the selfless love of Jesus Christ. His love is demonstrated to us by his ultimate gift of self-sacrifice for our salvation. A Mother’s love is the best witness because it is selfless, her love endures the good times, the bad times and always seeks to comfort her children. A Mother’s love always hopes, always prays and always wants the best for her children.

The longing of a Mother’s heart for the happiness of her children is an unceasing song within her heart. This beautiful gift of a Mother’s love is so powerful. In the moments a Mother witnesses her children suffer, she longs to take their place, just so that they may be spared any pain or suffering.

The reality of this world is it is often times unfair and for some cruel. There are some that didn’t know a Mother’s love or had a Mother that was so wounded from this world that they suffered as a result by never knowing a love like this. It’s in this broken world that the Mothers who share their love help bring healing to those around them. A Mother’s love speaks through her actions each day, in the little mundane tasks of daily life that the world often overlooks. It’s in the simplest things that a mother’s powerful love is most demonstrated. A Mother’s love is a gentle kiss on a boo-boo, a hug before school, it’s in a home cooked Sunday breakfast for her family, a Mother’s love can be so many things but most of all a Mother’s love is felt even in the absence of her presence.

Yes, even when so much time has passed after her creator has called her home, the love that a Mother’s soul has poured out onto this world and those who were blessed to be in her life endures. Her love lives on in all those she has ever loved and especially in her children, who are a living testimony of her love and they are her gift to this world. I write this for all the beautiful Mothers that have touched my life and for my dear friend Cynthia who was a beautiful Mother that touched many lives and whose love lives on.

Happy Mother’s day to every Mother I have been blessed to know and to my beautiful Mother Madolyn, I love you with all that I am. Thank you for the impact you have made on my life.

With great love,

Amanda

Love. Time. Death…

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As I sit on my sofa in a dark living room, listening to One Republics, Lets Hurt tonight. I ponder on Love, Time and Death. These are the main themes from the movie Collateral Beauty. I recall how much I enjoyed going to watch the movie a few months ago, with my mother Madolyn. It had been awhile since I had been to a movie. My time with her was uplifting and a reminder of how much I cherish her. She has been a glimpse of God’s love in my life. She has shown me over and over through time, what it is to be loved unconditionally. I have realized through her and how she loves me, what a beautiful gift, and what a glorious comfort it is to be loved unconditionally. I thank God for her…

Today, has also been a heart wrenching struggle with news that a dear and beautiful soul that has been an important part of my life doesn’t have much time left. She has fought cancer and led a courageous battle in mind, heart and spirit. Her faith has been a beautiful witness to her inner strength, she is a gift from God to all those who know her.

In this life, those rare and precious people come into our lives and without a second thought you’ve made memories, laughed together, loved and lived! Oh, the great memories I will cherish. The last time I saw her was so grand. That evening we spent together was not planned and as the best memories usually unfold it all started on a whim. We had run into each other at a special evening weekday mass and after mass she and I decided to crash a dinner party. We weren’t aware of the dinner until after mass and it was all in fun. We were received with such a warm welcome filled with joy, delicious foods and hand crafted drinks.

The moment is forever burned in my memory, that evening was special. Even more so in hindsight as even then I knew it was a special moment in time. I was aware of each rich moment, minute by minute amongst those I love most in this life. The dinner was in a beautiful home, the setting was ornate and as I asked her to pass me the guacamole, she commented “its always the skinny one who eats the most.” We laughed and laughed even more, when I answered the question of my relationship status to some guests that didn’t speak english by imitating a wolf howling at the moon, because how else do you translate “Lone wolfing it” from english to Spanish. Such beautiful laughter to my ears filled that home and even more laughter after my little demonstration, I am reminded of these bittersweet moments of my dear friend as she fights for life. My heart breaks for her family, she is a beautiful soul and her time is running out, and yet even though I know we all will face the moment in our lives when our time will run out, its excruciating when its someone you love so dearly.

All I know, is Love endures, yes, Love is pain when you lose those you love. The pain for us left behind is a world that is left dimmer from the loss of such a beautiful and bright soul. I must remind myself of the joy and the life that she will begin anew after she is released from this exile. Again, we all Love, we have all known Love, and the pain from the loss of those we love is a reflection of the extent, the depth of our love for those dearest to us. In this life there is never enough time with those we truly love.

Death is all something we get a little closer to with each passing day. And yes through it all we make beautiful memories like an accidental collateral beauty, just like that beautiful, accidental night we crashed the dinner party. The joy my heart felt that night still lingers but there is a grief and a sting as I know my friend is on her way to her true home.

As I listen to this song, its a strong reminder to say whats in your heart in this life, all the things in your heart, that maybe you couldn’t say before to those you love. Today is all any of us is guaranteed, so go out into this world and Love with all your heart!

Dare to love fearlessly and cherish the time given to you. Hold precious the time given to those you love. Be sure to notice the collateral beauty in your life. Don’t focus on tomorrow with such an intensity that you forget about the rare moments that you hold and cherish in your heart.

This day and everyday experience the collateral beauty all around you…

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To be without…

I had a conversation with my dad yesterday and it provided great insight. A deeper awareness to the total and enormous responsibility it is to raise children. Anyone can have children but to raise them requires effort, selflessness, faith and perseverance in times of trials. To raise Children you have to provide for all their needs, physical, mental and emotional.

He shared with me how when he was a young man and had begun a career in a specific trade he thought, that was it, he was secure. He never imagined he would ever be without work.

He shared with me that the scariest thing of being laid off and having little children was because of the role and responsibility of being “The provider.” To be faced with uncertainty, in a moment of time while raising small children. He never imagined that possiblilty, the unthinkable had happened and his sense of security was crushed. He emphasized how it was a shock to realize even with a specialized skill set, it didn’t guarantee him job security as he had expected. He reflected about a time when he was out of work. He was most afraid for his children. As he stated “they don’t know any better, or what’s going on. They are dependant on their parents to provide.”

It caused my pondering to go deeper. As I have been looking for work myself. I too have felt the concern about the uncertainty of how I will get by. One can’t help but wonder about tomorrow in circumstances such as these. To add upon these thoughts and think of tiny mouths to feed, on top of my many concerns about surviving, would surely be heart wrenching. The thought of not being able to provide even for a moment….My talk with my dad helped give me a broader perspective.

I now feel a deeper sense of compassion and empathy for all those unemployed looking for work, especially those with children. I ask that you join me in prayer, by taking just a moment and asking God to bless all those seeking work to find it. Especially families with little ones.

Some words I reflect on at times like this in my life, are what a priest told me during confession,

“God will never leave you or forsake you…he has your name written on the palm of his hand, he will not abandon you.”

It’s always a comforting reminder to ponder on these beautiful words, in the truth of the message. For God will always provide and he just asks for our trust.

Love and be good to people and reflect Christ’s love in this world. You never know when you may be in a place of vulnerability and humility.

I have a renewed respect for all the humble of heart. I have great hope and anticipation in the surprises God has in store for me and trust in his timing.

If you are in a similar situation or know someone who is, please be a friend. Be a witness to Christ’s love in this world and give what you can, maybe that’s an encouraging word, a meal, a ride to an interview or whatever it may be…be somebody’s miracle today. It’s amazing how the small things we can do for one another in times of need can be an answer to prayer. You can be a gift from God in someone’s life. The only way to live is to give, it provides a deep joy and happiness. Always give hope, love and always give unselfishly…

Youth is wasted on the young.

My senior year in high school, I was blessed by an opportunity to live with a good family. My father and mother had moved to another city the summer before. I was devastated. All my friends, the small town, that I had grown up in for the majority of my childhood years. All that was familiar, was very hard to let go. Especially before my senior year! I was an athlete, I knew my coach’s style, was comfortable with my teammates. I needed them and they needed me.

Graciously, the parents of one of my teammates offered their home. They invited me to live with them to complete my senior year. The coach really appreciated this, as I was his only Center for the basketball team. This new family treated me very well. I enjoyed the experience of new traditions and the daily routine with a new family. My friends mom was also a really amazing cook! Her parents were a multi-racial couple so I had the pleasure of tasting ethnic and traditional cuisines. Although Kimchi, is not something my palette cares for. My friend’s dad was a kind man. He was very intelligent and the type of soul that carried a warmth about him. He was a reserved and quite man but when he spoke his words always had depth. When he interacted and shared his perspectives, they always struck me. His name was Ed. He was an old soul and had provided well for his family. He had seen many things in his lifetime, served our country, suffered the loss of a spouse and he accomplished many great things. He would be defined as successful, in the way the world views it. But he was more than that, he was a rich man…rich in his faith for God, rich in his love for his family and rich in his generosity.

In the busyness, that was my senior year, with social events, basketball games and everything in between Ed would just casually say, “Youth is wasted on the young…” I recall hearing him say that at random many times to his daughter and I. I would listen and smile and go on about my studies or whatever I was focused on at that moment. I never really gave much thought to this expression of his.

Many years later, I still recall Ed, his memory and I can’t help but smile especially when I remember this statement he reiterated so often. In hindsight, I can see the truth in it now. I understand his words, as time is passing all too quickly now. In youth, many things are wasted, many things taken for granted, especially time. How comical it is, to realize how much time we had as youth or maybe I should say bittersweet in a nostalgic sense. So, lets make the most of today and start again tomorrow. Because you know, there is no more time to be wasted…

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Prayer

Prayer matters, when we fail to pray, we leave a door closed.

Prayer, is the reality of spiritual things affecting our physical world. The power that God bestows upon us in the gift of prayer is amazing. The gift of being able to communicate with our creator 24/7 is a grace unfortunately neglected. In the moments, when are hearts desire to speak to God, he sees the willingness of our hearts, minds and souls. The longing to express ourselves to God, to go to him in prayer is prompted by the Holy Spirit.

We are spiritual beings, as well as physical. It is only fitting that we give God praise and live in prayer. By prayer, we breathe life into our souls illuminating our minds. Prayer opens our hearts to hear the voice of God. By prayer, we are in essence, being held in the arms of God. You are carried each moment in prayer, as in the story of Footprints.

We all have time to pray! It’s just a matter of putting God first. Is prayer a priority to you? If the first thing you do is check Facebook each day or maybe even again before bed as many do checking “The big 3”, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. You have time to pray. Have you lost time for prayer, in the phantom relationships of social media? How much time have you lost each day? One hour, maybe two hours, or more scrolling online. Consider all the time, that adds up that you can never get back. What if you used a fraction of that time to pray. If you place prayer first in your day and make prayer time a priority in your life. Amazing things, will happen in your life. You will be given new perspectives through prayer. You will have doors opened for you, that you never dreamed of. Prayer will bring blessings to you and those in your life. A rich prayer life will help you to grow into who God intended you to be.

Today I encourage you to pray. Take five minutes and build on that each day and even when you don’t have the words, God knows your heart. Always pray…

Wait…

God always puts things in your spirit before they come to pass…Keep thanking God for all his gifts both seen and unseen. His gifts for your life will be revealed in his perfect timing.

Maybe your praying for that job, or the right friends to come into your life. Know that hope, that you feel within your spirit is a gift from God.
Recently, my dear friend Jennifer asked me to pray for a special intention. This was a reminder to me how we all are an important part of each others lives.

I thank God for the hope and blessings in my life and pray for abundant blessings to be bestowed on all my friends.

It is within my spirit that I feel deeply and sense God has many good and beautiful gifts ahead for me. It is important to never lose sight or hope in all of Gods goodness even in times of trial. His timing is always perfect. All we must do is live joyfully today, waiting patiently upon our God of Surprises. I have come to appreciate the waiting period, as time passes no matter what we do. When one has faith that God will bestow good things upon us it gives waiting a new and rewarding dimension that produces a joy in the anticipation. To wait fully trusting in the will of God for our lives, well there is a unique satisfaction in this process, in the waiting.

What have you felt God press upon your heart? Have you felt him place a hope for a particular gift in your life? Whether or not he has revealed inklings to you for what he has in store for your future. It is a gift to trust that God will place upon your heart glimpses of the plan he has for your life.

Take a moment to reflect on the deepest desires of your heart? Remember your friends and family who have helped you along the way. Never cease thanking God for all his goodness. For the gifts that have made you, who you are today. Wait and thank him for the gifts, he has yet to reveal for all your tomorrows.

New

As lent is fast approaching, I am reminded how God gives us the grace to renew our lives. It is during the forty day period before Easter Sunday that Catholics sacrifice and eliminate pleasures in order to express to God our desire to grow spiritually. Each year the Lenten season is a beautiful time to reflect on Gods love for each one of us. It is a time of conversion, a time for growth and a time to start a deep conversation with our God. During the Lenten season we are called to turn the eyes of our hearts away from our self and to gaze upon him. To focus on Jesus, he who gave his life for us to have eternal life.

Lent is a time for healing as well. Through prayer, penance and silence we are transformed interiorly. Lent is a lot like anything in life, such as excercise. You truly get out what you put in. If you commit to taking this Lenten season seriously and muster up the fortitude to finish what you started on Ash Wednesday whatever that may be, such as cutting out needless hours on social media, not watching or reducing tv or even something as simple as giving up sweets… know that it is important to finish what you started. It is only in getting outside our comfort zones that we grow. In lent we face the self imposed desert absent from creature comforts. Lent is a beautiful period of time from God in which he draws us more deeply to him.

Listen and hear him within the silence of your heart. Silence is the language of God. It is in silence and sacrifice that you will be made new.

The realization of how limited we can become in our capacity to love by confining ourselves to worldly pleasures and bad habits is revealed during lent. The forty days before Easter Sunday will help enable you to feel how much more capacity you really are capable of.

I encourage you to go to adoration frequently this lent. Especially if you are searching for truth, searching for answers…it is in his presence that you will receive truth because he is truth. You will receive healing. Maybe even a healing you weren’t even aware that you needed. I promise you, you will feel his Peace and healing in your life through the Eucharist. It’s through the Eucharist that God lives and finds a home within our mind, heart and soul. I personally have found great healing from going to daily mass. I understand the miracle of the Eucharist but even in light of my comprehension, what my heart has felt through daily communion has left me in awe of how powerful Gods love and healing is and it’s there for the taking. I have felt such an abundant joy from frequent adoration and communion in my life even when faced with uncertainty. I cannot even come close to describing fully how much our souls need to be in his presence. How much we need to be blessed sacraments to the world. We carry Jesus out like a burning torch of love and light that radiates from our souls when we leave mass after receiving him in a state of grace. I can only tell you, you must experience it for yourself and then you will know…

Our hearts long to be totally and utterly satisfied by his love alone, that is why they are restless in all other things.

How are you going to spend this Lenten season? Will you make a commitment to pray every day? You don’t have to do something big, just start small..pray and ask God where he wants to lead you. You will be amazed at the transformation within yourself if you commit to at least one thing this lent and follow through on that one thing all the way to Easter Sunday finishing what you started.

So whether you will be striving to spend one hour less watching tv each day, giving up alcohol or dedicating time to workout each day. Know that God will bear much fruit within you and it is the mere heartfelt intention that he sees in you that brings him joy. Always remember God loves you as if you were the only one created, he will never leave you or forsake you and only asks for your love. So be receptive to the ponderings of your heart and my prayers are with you for a blessed lent and a glorious Easter!

Potential

You’ll never know your true potential until you place yourself in the hands of God and tell him, I’m going to do it your way.

Do not allow yourself to live a life of compromise. Live and strive to follow Gods ways not the world. Many today are so very wounded. Maybe you or someone you know carries deep scars and a bondage of spirit. These wounds come from the lies of our culture that lead many away from Gods way.

By keeping our eyes, mind and heart fixed on Jesus we will be granted a freedom. Because when we focus on constantly loving him, knowing him and serving him…ultimately he will show you, the way. The way to live a fulfilled life. It is in deep relationship with Jesus, that God gives us the grace to turn away from sin. Allow God to guide you and through emulating his Love your heart will be freed from self-centeredness. In this way God can use your full potential, gifts and talents to help others. You are only truly able able to love others when you can deny yourself and give to another unselfishly and that is how we best serve the Lord. We are creatures of God. We are called to help our Brothers and sisters to come to know and love God. The greatest way we can do this is by how we live our lives. Are you a cafeteria catholic picking and choosing what you believe? Or will you be a Catholic that perseveres in Gods way. Faithfully abiding in the teachings of his church. Through the witness of our lives is how we can inspire others to do it Gods way. So many are doing it the worlds way, but believe in the graces and sacraments provided to us by God through his church.

In faith, demonstrate to others that the only one way to live is Gods way. This way of life will bring our hearts peace. We are all required to do our part.

Seeds…

School is intense and it takes fortitude. The ability to follow through requires discipline. The late nights studying and preparing projects, the sacrifices of social activities and lack of free time for hobbies could make any student forget what real life is like. I do look forward to the day when I will feel free…or at least not bound to the endless hoops of academia.

Although in analyzing the choice of whether to pursue education or not, it helps me to take into consideration that time will pass. Time passes for each one of us so quickly but how often do we really use our days in a productive way? One of my favorite mottos is “never stop improving .”

After going through a painful life transition that begun in 2015…I didn’t allow myself any downtime and almost immediately immersed myself in planting seeds for tomorrow. The solace I feel can be reflected in this quote:

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds that you plant.” -Robert L. Stevenson.

The path with many nights buried in books, in turning down social invitations even when I wanted to enjoy or participate in a friendly gathering. The commitment to my future prevailed. Even in light that it is totally unknown. I do not know where he is calling me, not yet…

I am aware that the alternative for many in similar situations of painful life changes is doing what many tend to do, such as trying to numb their pain or find themselves in the world, clubs or unhealthy relationships for validation and gratification.

I recall a conversation I had with a friend almost two years ago. My friend revealed how they dove into the world seeking pleasure and gratification. They made the choice to pursue the lures of today’s culture. In their mind they were just catching up on youth robbed from them. And As I listened to this conversation, my heart sank with sorrow for my dear friend, not out of pity but in the realization of all the time that was lost to them. The time that was taken from my friends family, and from my friends potential during those years..As I had desired to plainly and bluntly say …what did all that get you?! Where are those friends now? The ones you partied with and almost got into fights with, could your heart ever be whole from what you subjected it to? ALL that time, that you can never get back! The time forever lost to a vain attempt to relive an adolescence that wasn’t satisfied and interrupted by responsibility.

My heart wanted my friend to see how precious that time was, that time, that was lost but I said nothing with my words but only through my eyes. But in my friends testimony I was given a gift of perspective. A reinforcement of the desire in my heart to be different. Through my friend I learned the value of never underestimating the progress and improvements one can make just by focusing on and clearly understanding that pain doesn’t last, and attempts at covering it up with worldly pleasures are only holding many back from their full potential. Holding them back from their calling.

What is holding you back? Do you struggle with an addiction? Are you afraid of feeling pain or being alone? Know that you can overcome any anxiety, heartache or restlessness by giving it all to Jesus. He will never forsake you or abandon you and is always offering you a new day to cast all your burdens upon him. A new day to grow in him, to seek more, to be more and do more in him and through him. What a beautiful life we have been given. If you don’t have fortitude ask for it, if you don’t have discipline then challenge yourself and if you fail pick yourself up and try again. And if your on the narrow path, persevering, all I can say is keep on!!! One day it will all be worth it! You got this!

“What is the kingdom of God like? What shall I compare it to? It is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his garden. It grew and became a tree, and the birds perched in its branches.”

-Luke 13:18-19